Discussion: Moving on from toxic relationships

In this discussion, we will follow this order:

  • The importance of knowing our limits
  • A period of grief
  • Avoiding romance movies, shows, or music
  • Keeping ourselves busy without forgetting our well-being
  • Doing the things that we couldn’t do while we were in a relationship
  1. The importance of knowing our limits

When they tell you that you should love yourself first before you love someone else, it’s true, but it’s still hard to remember ourselves when we love the other person so much.

This brings me to say that LOVE is scary because your world basically revolves around this person that may or may not appreciate it. You may receive the same affection or you end up being used. While it can be rewarding to love, sometimes it can be destructive.

When we’d have enough, we break up with this person or we stay in it, but we’ll be miserable.

Would you rather stay in a toxic relationship and be miserable or leave, move on and be happy?

2. A period of grief

Breakups are never easy. You can’t just break up and wake up the next day feeling happy. Whether you’re the one who broke up with the person or the other party is the one who initiated the breakup, you won’t be suddenly happy the next day. If you are, you probably never even loved the person.

In order for you to move on, you have to accept that it will take time to get over it and that being sad for a while is okay and normal. This can last weeks or months, but as long as you accept and are aware of this process and you believe that everything will be alright soon, you’re on the right track.

3. Avoiding romance

Now, I don’t know about you guys, but after a breakup, I don’t feel like seeing couples or watching romance films. These don’t help because you’ll be reminded of your ex. You’ll remember all the memories that you’ve shared and you’ll just be even more upset. Once you’ve completely moved on, that’s when you can start watching that genre of film, but if you’re still in the process of getting over a person, just don’t. Also, don’t go to places where you used to spend so much time together with the person. Avoid social media too because you will just end up wanting to text them back.

4. Keeping ourselves busy without forgetting our well-being

This helped me move on. A lot of the time when we end our relationship with someone, we start to think WHAT IF. We can’t help but THINK. We think and think until our mind is either filled with hope or regret.

So, to avoid that, we have to keep our minds occupied. Be busy! You can work, schedule time with friends and family, take on new courses, go to the gym… Do anything that will stop you from just staying home with nothing to do but think.

At the same time, take care of yourself. Be busy the right way. While you do all these activities, also make sure you stay healthy.

Also, take this time to learn about yourself; learn about what you want.

5. Doing the things that we couldn’t do while we were in a relationship

You have to admit, you couldn’t do some things when you were in a relationship. We had to compromise and sometimes our partner can even stop us from doing something we really want to do.

Therefore, when you become single again, why not take this opportunity to live life the way you want to. Do the things that you want to do or the things that you enjoy. No one is there to stop you.

Before you enter another relationship, make sure you enjoy your life as a single woman or man first because you never know, maybe when you become taken again, you won’t be able to do everything you want.

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